I want to pare down everything.

This is what I have been attempting to do all year. In my artwork. In my living spaces. In my relationships. Forthrightness. Cleanliness. Honesty. Getting rid of things I don’t need. Eliminating things I don’t use. Saying goodbye to things I don’t want. Trying to lead a more simplistic lifestyle so that I can focus on the important things in life? (i.e. eating well, honing skills, responsibly managing my money, connecting with people, exploring, enjoying my 20s, etc).

I have been giving away belongings all summer, and have made a lot of progress. Peeling away the layers of crap that I have surrounded myself with since childhood has felt really good and liberating, as it should. But somehow, I find that it is never enough. It’s like…I get this burst of energy to purge everything, and then I reach a plateau where I feel good about my progress and then I stop to pat myself on the back and ‘take a breather’…prematurely. Shortly thereafter I slowly continue accumulating more, when I should be at a stasis.

Life is complicated enough as it is. Why should I be over-complicating and over-cluttering mine with more and more things? I don’t need so many multiples of items that I don’t even use. I need to stop assuming I will need them later, when ‘later’ will more than likely not come any time soon. Once I crawl out from underneath the crap that I have been holding onto, then I can have no excuse not to start living…right?

What further complicates matters is that I feel like I am on self-imposed house arrest. Once my immediate surroundings become a minimalist haven, then what? I go to work. I come home. I go to work. I come home. I therapeutically indulge in teen dramas and transhumanist literature in my spare time, but beyond the obvious…I don’t do anything.

Remind me to consider finding some more useful hobbies once I am done putting my room on a diet.

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One thought on “I want to pare down everything.

  1. Pingback: Seriously Though, Less Really *Is* More «

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